The Fragile Thread of Love: Why Relationships Deserve Patience, Not Impulse
By Dr. Sunil S. Rana
Relationships are not built in a day, nor are they sustained by mere obligations. They are woven slowly- thread by thread- with affection, empathy, respect, and an unspoken commitment to stand by one another. This eternal truth has been beautifully captured by the great poet Rahim in his timeless couplet:
“रहिमन धागा प्रेम का, मत तोड़ो चटकाय।
टूटे से फिर ना जुड़े, जुड़े गाँठ परि जाय॥”
Meaning:
Rahim reminds us that the bond of love is like a delicate thread. Once broken in anger or haste, it is extremely difficult to restore. Even if rejoined, it bears a knot- a reminder of hurt, distrust, or bitterness.
In today’s fast-paced world, where tempers are short and egos are large, this simple doha carries profound wisdom.
Love: A Thread More Delicate Than Silk:
Modern relationships often fall prey to impulsiveness, miscommunication, and ego-driven reactions. We speak before thinking, accuse before understanding, and withdraw before trying.
But love- even in its strongest form- is fragile.
It requires care, clarity, and conscious effort.
In the Mahabharata, Vidura cautions Dhritarashtra with a message that resonates even today:
“Where anger dominates, wisdom disappears.”
A single moment of rage can devastate years of affection.
The Ego: The Silent Enemy of Bonds:
Most broken relationships are not destroyed by external factors- they collapse under the weight of ego.
The Bhagavad Gita (16.18) warns us:
“Blinded by ego, power, and pride, such people hate others and harm themselves.”
The Gita’s wisdom teaches that pride clouds perception, making us see even love as conflict.
When ego enters, compassion exits.
When ego speaks, relationships fall silent.
Why Broken Trust Is Hard to Mend:
Just like Rahim’s “knot”, every emotional wound leaves a mark.
- Words said in anger echo longer than intended.
- Silence in moments of need becomes unforgettable.
- Apologies may heal, but scars remain as reminders.
Our ancient scriptures emphasise Satya (truth) and Ahimsa (non-harm)- not just towards others’ bodies, but towards their emotions. Emotional harm, too, is violence.
Patience: The Greatest Ornament of Love:
The greatest Indian philosophers consistently taught that patience is the highest discipline.
Swami Vivekananda said:
“Relationships are more important than life, but it takes both to maintain them.”
Like a sacred thread, love must be protected with:
- Patience instead of irritation
- Understanding instead of assumption
- Dialogue instead of silence
- Compassion instead of ego
These are the spiritual tools that prevent the delicate thread from snapping.
Mahabharata’s Lesson: One Harsh Moment Can Change Destiny:
Draupadi’s humiliation in the Kuru court did not happen in a single instant- it was the result of several small moral fractures:
- A brother’s arrogance
- A king’s silence
- A family’s divided loyalty
- A friend’s absence of empathy
Each “knot” tightened until the thread finally snapped, leading to a catastrophic war.
The Mahabharata teaches us that relationships crumble not in one explosion, but in small, accumulated moments of neglect, ego, and unspoken hurt.
Forgiveness: The Art of Rejoining the Thread- Without the Knot:
If a bond breaks, the goal is not just to tie it back, but to heal the very fibre.
Forgiveness is not weakness- it is emotional intelligence rooted in self-mastery.
As the Gita says:
“He who is calm in praise or blame is truly steady in wisdom.”
Forgiveness dissolves knots before they harden permanently.
But it requires mutual effort—one to apologise sincerely, another to forgive wholeheartedly.
Conclusion: Nurture the Thread Before It Breaks:
Rahim’s couplet is not merely poetry- it is a warning and a guideline.
Love demands:
- Gentleness in speech
- Grace in conflict
- Sensitivity in anger
- Respect in disagreement
Every relationship carries potential- either to elevate us spiritually or to scar us emotionally.
So, before reacting, judging, or withdrawing, pause and remember:
A delicate thread once broken may be restored, but the knot becomes a permanent reminder.
Preserve love before it reaches that point.
Comments
Post a Comment